Drifter

I dig a little bit deeper,
and I realize that
I've achieved nothing
since the beginning of my uni.

Its true that I have gained experiences,
met people of different spectrum,
but none of these are achievements,
they are merely "a vast range of experiences".

I have not fully commit myself into anything,
everything was done half-hearted.
Experiences were wasted,
opportunities were squandered.

A drifter I have been.
Afraid of the actual commitments,
avoiding the associated responsibilities.

Drive

Mary asked us to focus on one single word
throughout the BB class the other day.
Drive.
That was my word for the day.

To drive the world,
to drive my future,
to drive myself over the next hurdle,
I need to be able to find my drive.

The energy that keeps me moving,
the faith that enables me to make impossible leaps,
the motivation that prompts me to keep trying,
I need to know my drive.

And Sasha Azevedo once said,

“To believe in yourself and to follow your dreams, to have goals in life and a drive to succeed, and to surround yourself with the things and the people that make you happy - this is success!”

My colleague thinks that I'm like Peter Pan.
Boyish, she said. Hah!
How I wish I am now in Neverland,
never have to grow old,
never have to grow up.

Where is tinkerbell and the lost boys?
Its time to draw my sword and kick some pirates' asses.
Soaring through that sliver clouds,
continue in believing magics and wonders.

Monica came in to work today.
Heaps of fun.
I like working with her.
She's like a ball of energy
radiating strength and motivation.
I feel like a better person around her.
She is strong and capable,
for that I admire her.

Why is it that the stronger ones are expected to take care of the weaker ones?
Why are we tolerating and silently accepting their inefficiencies?
What happened to 'survival of the fittest'?
Its unfair.
Why am I trying so hard to be better then?
Why don't I just cut myself some slack and be a scumbag?
Why don't I just leech of someone else?
Its unfair.

Life is unfair.
And hence that's life.